To Think or Not To Think?
Though thinking is an unconscious and continuous activity it is not a subject often considered, by thinkers. While analyzing William Golding’s three grades of I came to the realization that many different levels of thinking exist and are affected by many different elements. However I do believe that Golding’s grades, with some tweaking, are a good base to start at. This base coupled with discussion of many elemental levels can make for a very confusing and complex subject.
Just a short time ago I was talking with a friend about a particular stage that all people, primarily teens, go through. I call it the stupid stage. It is when the persons conscious and ability to decide what a smart decision is ceases to affect there decision making. We speculated, with our minimal hindsight, what we believed our stupid stages were. I decided that mine was last summer; some choices I made and my attitude were not exactly smart. This friend of mine thought of a recent relationship that was a major cause of conflict between her and other friends. The boy in the relationship was not the most mature and made it to be a learning experience for her. After we gone through ourselves we moved on to other people we knew. We talked about how some people never grow out of this grade two stage. Grade two is the thinkers that are pessimistic and point out faults of others. They are very much the grade of thinking that people going through stupid stage are at. Although I like to believe my grade two stage is over for good, however I sometimes worry about a relapse.
When this stage occurred I realized that I was not happy with who I was, most of my life I have led a very sheltered life. My parents are still together, we were never terribly poor, and we have always been a normal family. When this period set in I started to do things that where not in my personality I had a horrible attitude and constantly snapped at family members and friends. What made me change was when I realized that I didn’t want to be a grade two thinker for the rest of my life.
I like to believe that most of the time I am a grade 1.5 thinker. I possess the pessimistic view that most teenagers hold but I believe I possess a slightly more realistic view of things. This view has shaped my life in many ways. It involves how I deal with pressure, stress, intellect and problems.
When presented with a problem I often leave it to rest for a while. I am not the kind of person that is constantly worrying about what I have to do. In a sense I like to sleep on it. I decide better when I am able to think about something for a while. This allows me to process all aspects of a problem and be completely educated on it before making a decision. This however sometimes allows me to procrastinate a decisions and other tasks I have been given. This is not always a good thing and something that I have been trying to get better at.
One thing that brings out the worst in me is stress. The kind of stress that is the worst for me is the kind I can’t do anything about. I am constantly trying to force my mind to think about other things but it never works. My mind constantly wanders back to what is stressing me out. What is interesting about being stressed out is that is always seems to build all at once. After one thing happens another and another happen until I reach a breaking point. This breaking point is always a time of thinking for me. It seems that when life is its hardest I learn the most.
One aspect of my thinking that I am very scatter brained at is when I write. I am always constantly starting over and trying to make something start better. Also, I am horrible at grammar so I don’t notice things that other people do. When I sit down to write, I usually list the main points I want to talk about and then, once I get on a roll I just go with it and try to make some sense out of what I am saying. There is definitely room for improvement in the way I process my writing.
Finally I believe the way I think is affected by the elements around me. Some day if it is sunny might be more likely be in a better mood and not be as critical. Other days when school is getting tough I might be less likely to give someone a break. This can for definite changes in my attitude and mood. I believe my thinking is fairly complex and shoes my personality more than I would like it to. I admit that I am not always the most significant thinker but I think I have some time to improve on that.
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